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Life just added a fork in the road.
Let's take it.
It’s been nearly 2 years since I made my first trip to Pennsylvania. In that time I’ve driven more than 20k miles back and forth to Missouri. Since I only drive 1.1 miles to the office, my yearly mileage average is still looking good!
This past weekend I started really working on my yard and landscaping since I moved. It’s still a mess, but I no longer feel like the eyesore of the neighborhood. The prior owner of my house kept a beautiful yard and I’d like to do the same. This fall I’ll plant more bulbs, work on sculpting my lilac bush, and plan on more azaleas and maybe some hydrangea bushes on the side of the house. Cultivating a garden is like reading for me. I love to do it, but feel like my time would be better spent doing other things. (cleaning, stripping wallpaper, etc). The end result is satisfying, but there is guilt associated with it. Making myself stop working is something I struggle with daily. It is a major accomplishment if I sit and do nothing.
I can’t cook unless the kitchen is clean.
I can’t sleep if my laundry isn’t put away.
I can’t do a tiny bit of a project.
Go big or don’t go at all.
These things used to bother me, but it’s how I am. No one else is hurt by my habits, so they are mine and it’s just fine. Knowing the difference between preferences and harmful habits is a journey.
Do you recognize any of your harmful habits? Is the guilt associated with them justified or should you just let that shit go?
The doors of the world have started to creak open. We tiptoe out of our houses and dunk our toes in the water. It feels so good, but it's still a little chilly for me. I'll stay on the dock for a while longer. It's what I need and that's ok.
What do you do when you start to struggle? When I feel like I'm drowning, I lay back and float until the feeling passes.
Click the watch me page to see what's up. Time for some new recipes in my new kitchen. If you have requests, let me know!